


Episode Tag: Episode 3.6  "Realization"

by rufferto



Category: Black Sails
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 15:53:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6121657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rufferto/pseuds/rufferto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Billy figures out his feelings<br/>Contains spoilers for episode<br/>One Shot</p>
            </blockquote>





	Episode Tag: Episode 3.6  "Realization"

Billy watched Vane and Flint from the other side of the ship.

For months now his feelings were all over the place. On the beach when he saw the sword about to end Flint's life, the scope of those feelings had finally caught up with him. Flint had been about to die and he should have been cheering for it. He wanted to cheer. He’d told Ben he wanted to watch the man die and at the time he’d been thoroughly convinced that was the case. And now he knew the reason why. If Flint died, so would the chaos inside him. He could breathe again. He could live again without that man being the focus of his life.

Fuck.

Now he had to deal with the feelings and this new reality. It had been Charles fucking Vane who had stopped Blackbeard from killing Flint. It should have been him. He should have had the balls to do what Charles Vane did.

He knew exactly what emotion he was feeling right now.

_Pure. Absolute. Jealousy._

Charles Vane was on the same level as Flint. Flint respected him.

And Billy?

Billy was horrified at the revelation he’d come to the moment Flint got up from the sand.

He loved the man.

He was _in love with_ the man.

His world crashed down around him when the realization hit home. It made sense now, all of it. What’s worse, he knew that Flint KNEW.

When Flint left Vane to his own self to brood,the Captain subtly glanced about the deck and his eyes fell on Billy. It was going to be one of the usual looks, Billy knew. He clenched his fists and waited for it. This time he understood what it meant.  
  
_God I hate him. I hate him for doing this to me!_

Billy wanted to scream at the world. He was utterly undone by the knowledge that this man had somehow gotten past all of his defenses. This man had gripped his heart without even trying.

_I don’t want to love him!_

He wished God would make it stop. Hadn’t he been through enough? What possible reason could there be to love such a man? Why him? There were plenty of other men he could have loved, wanted… needed? He never looked at another man twice.

_I have to have him!_

Billy met Flint’s eyes from across the deck and refused to look away as he usually did. He watched the Captain’s facial expression turn from slightly mischievous because he was looking where he shouldn’t, to surprise. Billy had never met Flint fully in the past, gaze for gaze. He’d been afraid of the man.

_I need to have him!_

It was Captain James Flint or no one else. Billy knew. He was desperately in love. He was completely torn up by the conflict inside him. His heart thudded in his chest and he was acutely aware of every hair on his body. He swallowed and a trickle of sweat slid down his cheek. He felt his mind start to wonder.  What it would be like to touch his cock? Would it feel good? Hard? Warm? Cold? Would he like being touched by Billy? Would they kiss? Billy’s tongue whetted his lips. How did things happen between men? What would it feel like to have another man’s body pressed up against him? His gaze dropped to Flint’s lips and he saw them part instinctively.

_Jesus Fucking Christ._

The man knew what was going through his mind and Billy was finding it difficult to breathe. He quickly lifted his eyes back up to Flint’s and tried to think. It barely registered when Flint jerked his head slightly as if to instruct Billy to follow. It wasn’t really clear and it only left him more confused.

Billy stood rooted to the spot as he watched Flint walk away.

What the hell was that? An invitation?

His palms felt slightly sweaty and his shirt sort of clung to his chest.

“Billy.”

The sound of his name snapped him out of it. He was absolutely not just caught staring at Flint’s ass. “What?” Billy snapped without thinking, his voice a touch high.

Someone needed him and he thanked his lucky stars. In that moment he might have done it. He might have followed the man and cornered him somewhere. It would have been a senseless, rough encounter and he didn’t want that.

Now that he understood his feelings at least he could taper them in. When he finally got his hands on James Flint he’d be in control. The situation would go his way. It would be order in fucking chaos. He’d satisfy his hunger and get the fuck out.

One time, that’s all he needed.

He could live with it if he only ever got one chance.

_Maybe._


End file.
